I recently came across a spoken word poetry by Sabrina Benaim called Explaining My Depression to My Mother and it inspired me to write this post. It’s hard confessing feelings and emotions to someone close but in my case … My mother. I don’t want to be like my mom, I’m not her and I’m not planning to be. I want to be different, I don’t want to raise my children same way I was raised. It sounds bad as I’m typing this but I don’t agree with some parenting ways my mother used on me and my siblings, and that’s okay because I don’t think we are wired to grow up exactly like our parents.
Mom doesn’t believe in depression and anxiety, or most of the mental health issues. She believes its related to religion, if you are close to god then you won’t be depressed and I don’t agree with that. I don’t blame her, I mean they’ve been raised this way and their era has been nurturing such closed mind mentality. When I was going through postpartum depression, I didn’t talk about it with my family but more with my friends who has same mentality as me and understands these struggles.
I want to be as understanding as I wished my mother to be. I had a long super dark hair till I reached college because my mother didn’t allow me to dye or cut it, let alone just a small trim. I hated it because it was really hard to maintain, it was so long that it reached under my butt. I started trimming it on my own without telling her obviously but I did get caught few times until one day I chopped off all of my hair, and she gave me a look I’ll never forget, like she’s disappointed in me and it made me feel horrible. It didn’t really last long as I tried to make her understand that it’s who I am, I don’t like having dark long hair. She still gives me those looks whenever I dye my hair and repeats about how my hair was so beautiful and long, now it’s ruined and it’s too damaged.
God Knows how much I love my mother and I know I can’t live without her but I don’t want to be like her, I am who I am.
Thank you to Karalee & Lise for nominating me for tag, of course their handwriting look beautiful compared to mine so go easy on me.
- Write your name
- Write your blog’s name
- Write your favorite word and its definition
- Write something nice
- Write the name of your favorite song right now
- What are you writing with?
- Write a fun fact about yourself
- Write/draw your favorite emoticon
- Write a silly message
- Write who you’re tagging
According to my mother “You’re handwriting is so tiny that it looks like a chicken foot prints” I don’t think anyone can top that.
Actually I nominate any person reads this blog, I would love to see your handwriting so be sure to send me the link if you do.
Hope you’re having a great day and thank you for reading.
Yesterday was my son’s first birthday and I’ve been planning for the party for quite sometime now since I’ve been scheduling posts throughout these couple of weeks and it was supposed to be happening on 13th since on his actual birthday date everyone would be having their final exams but last week my great grandmother passed away and so I thought of postponing the party till next month instead because it doesn’t feel right to celebrate during this time.
I planned for a Pusheen themed birthday party because I believe my son is secretly a cat. I bought a Pusheen plushie while I was pregnant as a gift for my baby before he was born, I didn’t know if my child would be a boy or a girl back then so I thought getting the plushie would fit any baby.
For the party supplies, I ordered them from John Lewis.
The order was delivered fast actually, I thought it would take time since I ordered it around Christmas. I haven’t had the time to pick it up from the post office yet so I can’t give my honest review, I’ll probably post about it when I finish planning for the party though.
Hope you enjoyed this post, have a great day.
Don’t forget to check out my 200 Follower Giveaway
First of all, I would like to thank my new followers, thank you so much for your support I never thought I’ll be gaining this much of a following base to be honest.
Now on to the main subject, I’ve been posting everyday in the past two months and I thought I should change that up since I sometimes get burned out from posting so I thought of posting at least four times a week with a day in between without posting so on Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. Also because I’ll be going to UK in couple of weeks for a vacation with my husband and son so I won’t be posting anything during that time. I’ll schedule some posts to be up while I’m away and I’ll probably use the app from my phone if I had time.
Hope you’re having a great day and thank you for reading.
It’s been awhile since I posted a story from my I-think-not-so-boring-life so I thought of sharing one that happened to me during my first months of my current job. If you read my post about my
amazing coworker, you would know that I work in the IT department so we get calls quite frequently from employees basically whining that their PC not working but in the end it turns out they forgot their passwords.
So on this day, I got a call from a manager needing some assistance so instead of working on his machine remotely I went to his office to see what’s his problem exactly. I thought people would know at least basic English skills and know how to function a PC since it’s 2016 but I was so wrong because ever since I got the job, I found out that hiring idiots is still a thing and let me give you an example, once an employee called me asking how to add an image to a document on MS Word.
I went to his office and he was an elderly man who seriously need to retire and stay home. I sat on his desk as I opened his PC while he was explaining what’s wrong. He was still using Windows XP OS and refuses to change it because … he doesn’t want his work to be transferred to a newer machine, he got two freakin’ machines next to each other and he plugs which one he wants to work in either Windows 7 or Windows XP. His problem (As he kept repeating even though it’s not exactly a problem) was just installing some software he used in the Windows XP machine to the newer one. Anyway while I’m waiting for this god forsake machine to boot up as I worked on it, he kept demanding things endless and I was trying to calm myself not to rage on him because he’s … old… And I’m trying so hard to respect him.
While he continued demanding like I’m his personal maid or something, he handed me his phone and asked me RUDELY “Install WhatsApp for me”
I almost lose all my temper and was about to throw the phone to his face and just leave because this was getting ridiculous and I don’t think this was part of my job requirement in any way. I phoned the ladies at the IT department basically saying “Come here before I do something that might get me fired”.
The gist of the story is, I don’t want to deal with these type of bossy people again because I might flip the table on their heads.
In the midst of this person insanity, he actually came to see me .. or so he pretend to be and here’s how it happened. If you need a little of a backstory of my catfishing story, be sure to check out first, second, third and fourth part.
It was the weekend morning and I was checking my phone for new messages from this totally sane person. He started off with quite a cheerful mood in his messages which was weird to be honest and all the sudden he sends “Guess where I am ?” I was confused because it came out of the blue so I answered “Where ?” He said “Sultan Qaboos Grand Mosque” (In case you didn’t know, it’s the main mosque in my country. Quite known and also a tourist attraction) So obviously I freaked out saying OMG HE’S HERE!!
I should’ve really question that part because Grand Mosque is like a main tourist attraction so he could’ve googled it easily but alas younger me didn’t get slapped enough by friends – what friends ? Anyway I was trying to calm myself because I got excited and he told me last night after I slept, he took a plane from UK to Oman – how sweet .. ‘A’ class boyfriend. He asked me to suggest a decent hotel for him to stay in and I thought of a 5 star hotel since he’s clearly royal and all so I said Holiday Inn or Intercontinental Hotel, can you guess what he replied ? “Oh they seem expensive” No joke your royal highness.
Anyway he said he’ll settle in Holiday Inn hotel and asked me if I knew a car renting place because he wants to drive around in Oman .. with me. I gave him the number of a place nearby my house that I knew and he said he chose a Mercedes, I mean of course it’s practically a Ferrari or a Bugatti for him but being in a five star hotel is too expensive for him. We decided to meet in the afternoon and he wants to drive me around, we’ll finally go on a first ever date and I’ll finally see this dude face to face … I was wrong obviously.
By noon he sent to me “My father found out I left my apartment in UK and came to Oman, he got furious” I knew it “He sent men from the embassy to pick me up from the hotel and they literally held me like a criminal in cuffs” Oh the drama, the scandal “I’m right now in the embassy and I’ll be sent back to UK in an hour .. I was looking forward in meeting you, I even told the guy working in the hotel to clean the Mercedes so we can properly go on a date”
Of course he’ll do this whole lie, what was I expecting ? I don’t even think he was in Oman in the first place, these places can be easily searched online but wow how I did get my hopes so high that it hurt so bad like I’ve fallen face first from that height.
It’s been awhile since I posted a story from my school days so I remembered this incident when I was in the 12th grade. So as you know I love videogames and back then I was into Fatal Frame series and I mean totally obsessed that I want to live that videogame even though I’m going to probably die from the atmosphere and not from a ghost.
I had a subject called English Skills which was an elective along with the normal English subject but it had more assignments and homeworks to do. The teacher asked us to write an essay about a city or a town, explaining facts about them and what makes them interesting. Of course me being all cheeky and want to think out of the box, I wrote about Minakami village (All Gods Village) from Fatal Frame 2 saying this a real cursed village and I included images from the game like these:
In my defense, some people had few points that this village is real and of course I really wanted to believe it. So here I was submitting an essay about a videogame gameplay area with CGI pictures of this place – Wow you must be trying too hard to prove you’re a gamer.
Naturally the teacher gave me a WTF look the moment she read the introduction as she finished reading, she was absolutely confused and asked me “Are you sure this is real ?” Are you doubting a gamer ? Eventually she made me rewrite this essay with an actual real city because she refused to believe that village existed but hey I tried sliding it like it was real, can’t blame me for trying.
The gist of the story, if I could turn back time to that moment I would’ve used real images of some random village and slap on them the label Minakami Village because I still believe it exists.