Stories

The Time I Got Catfished – Survived a Bullet Through The Head

Welcome back to my series of unfortunate events featuring the one and only my online ex boyfriend. If this is your first time reading this, I suggest checking out the first and second part to get a little bit of a back story of how I got catfished by this crazy person.

As usual it started with a simple argument and me deciding not to talk this X guy, so he all the sudden decided to move out from his apartment because … add a little drama ? Anyway, as he leaves this apartment – he has to describe word by word what he’s doing and I mean even the part ‘dramatically turning to see his friend named Jessica saying “No … don’t go” wait wait who’s Jessica ?

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This Jessica is a fellow colleague from his university and she’s blonde with blue eyes – I mean yeah of course that’s how British people supposed to look, right ? This Jessica character was created to stir some jealousy whenever I go against him, too bad it never worked.  It was at night and the wind was slowly blowing the hero’s hair, Jessica stood in front of him and said “No, don’t go” she paused and then continued “Why are you doing this ?” He stepped forward, leaving the door of the apartment behind and stood shoulder to shoulder next to the blonde-haired teary eyes girl without a single word. She turned to face him and grabbed him while sinking her lips against his but he pulled back … And walked away.

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That’s exactly how he described the encounter by the way, let your imagination flow because this legit happened in his mind. So he continued messaging me of course still describing the situation and somehow he said “I kicked a car, I hope it’s not a black guy’s car” apart from being racist about this – surprise, he stopped talking to me for about 5 hours. What happened you ask ?

I got a message from the lovely Jessica saying, the car was owned by gang leader and they found him, shot him in the head and he’s in the hospital now. This was getting ridiculous and I was skeptical – finally Rei your mind started working, praise the lord. I asked her to send me a picture of him in the hospital and this Jessica kept making up excuses that he’s in the surgery room at the moment, and she’s outside waiting and crying because she’s the friendzoned girl who is jealous of me, his girlfriend whom he never seen or met. During this conversation she sent me a picture of the room he’s supposedly in and it just showed doctors’ back, later on I found this picture on google.

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Few hours passed by and this Jessica was still messaging me telling me what’s going on and apparently he survived, wow shocking. By this point I understood his facades and decided to play along to see where his stories would end. Then later he was messaging me normally like nothing really happened and life goes on.

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15 thoughts on “The Time I Got Catfished – Survived a Bullet Through The Head

      1. He also sent me an inhaler picture as he supposedly needed it, saying he’s matching mine since i got asthma so i use it from time to time. The inhaler he sent me a picture of had a heart shape sticker, i later found that picture on google traced back to an asthma website

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      2. Yup XD but honestly i’m enjoying writing it here, didn’t think people would be interested in this. Most of my traffic comes from twitter and path so i get comments there rather than here

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      3. I think everyone loves a good story, really! At least you know people are interested 🙂 I like to just comment directly on blogs, i always set aside some time every day to go through everything in the reader and interact

        Liked by 1 person

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